um

i was just on grouphug.us cause i'm a big loser and i read this:

"I work for the government, and I have information that could change people's view of existance entirely... just wait till you find out, sooner or later."

and i got so scared. i don't think i'll be sleeping tonight or if i do i'll have to wrap myself in tinfoil. i don't know what exactly the tinfoil thing really is for but i saw it in the movie Signs and if they did it in a movie that must mean it's good for something. oh yeah, the alien at the portuguese birthday party gave me nightmares. when i was a kid my recurring nightmare was getting trapped in Superstore at night. i have nothing against Superstore and their everyday low prices and workers on rollerblades in the daytime, but at night with the lights off i imagine that it's like whoa ghosts and murderers and little imaginary elephants from Dumbo everywhere. it must be something about those high ceilings.

roosky krab

it takes me 7 minutes to eat an apple

dude yr so crazyyy

guess what! i'm gonna fail everything. and by fail i don't mean "i'm chinese-ish and got less than 90%". i mean FAIL FAIL. the only class i'm not sucking ass in is spanish. what am i gonna do with spanish? be Estuardo's chinese-ish maid? what is this, bizarro world? he's supposed to me my maid. if you fail high school do you automatically become homeless? what's the prerequisite for homelessness?

nothing

here's a stupid survey because i can't think of anything better to write.

what brand of deodorant do you use: lady speed stick (this reminded me of how today in chemistry someone smelled like onions and i wasn't sure who it was and i was really worried it was me. people who smell like onions are disgusting. if i ever smell like onions i give you permission to shoot)
do you watch porn: i happen to have seen a few ron jeremy's. i love him. i really don't know why. appearance-wise, he is pretty gross but he is so funny in real life. and that is worth +250 hotness points. he used to be a high school teacher. could you imagine if your high school teacher was a porn star? 9.75 inches...
do you have any pets: a rabbit. he's a cool cat
who are you going to vote for?: ndp
do you have your own phone line: no one ever calls me and i'm really bad at carrying a conversation. i hate phones.
your thoughts on abortion: pro abortion
what do you want to do with your life?: buy a lighthouse, move to nova scotia, save the world, eat pesto, visit Legoland (the danish one)
would you ever get plastic surgery, if so, on what?: i wish i looked like a normal human being. but i wouldn't get surgery. more because of the pain, not moral objections
do you think foreign accents are sexy?: mother eff yes, but it depends on what kind
do you like hot dogs?: i try to avoid mysterious meats.
ever taken ballet?: ...i was horrible. they always put me in the back for performances and surrounded me with a circle of tall people so noone could see how bad i was
most attractive person you know?: physically the obt of course, jesus man, and this boy i used to see at the library all the time. it was pretty wierd, but totally hot. there aren't that many good looking people around here.
do you wish you could live somewhere else?: of course i do, i live in bumfuck coquitlam
you think about suicide: doesn't everybody think about it? thinking about it doesn't mean you'll do it
do you write in cursive or print?: ew cursive, it is so pretentious and 3rd grade and passe. and... i don't know how to do proper uppercase T's

i love croissants.

i feel like i win when i lose

abba was a great band. i don't like how all these people think just because they have a long blonde haired woman and a brown haired woman and a guy with a beard and another guy without a beard, they can make an abba ripoff band. there is only one abba. and you are not it. abba always puts me in a good mood. for some reason whenever people find out about this they start kicking my ass. maybe i should stop telling people. no, i love abba too much. abba is so much better than some of the crappy music now. swedish things are cool. i'm not a big fan of the meatballs but i hear they're a big seller at Ikea, another cool swedish invention. i don't really like the Hives though. i'm probably gonna get another beating for saying that. i don't like all the new bands that start with 'The -'. for example, The Trews. they suck. they, and all the other 'The -' bands all sound the same. they all have lead vocalists with dirty hair and all their music videos look the same. everything sucks. except for abba and other things that i like.